February 22, 2005
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C-3PO comments on images found on Paris Hilton's hacked Sidekick: "Oh my!"
On Jeff Ganon/James Guckert's plans to sue Media Matters: "R-2 says the chances of winning are seven-hundred and twenty-five to one."
On Bill Burkett plans to sue CBS News for publishing his phony memo:""Sometimes I just don't understand human behavior."
On the USA Next advertisement: "Good heavens, gay you say?"
On former Kerry advisers working for the UN and making anti-Fox News ads:"I believe they think I'm some sort of god."
On Taliban giving up in Afghanistan:""Wait a minute! Where are you going!"
On the British Navy recruiting the gays:"Are they in need of a protocol robot?"
On Congressman Hinchey's retreat from reality: "Oh switch off!"
On Elizabeth Hurley in new Harry Potter movie: "Fabulous."
On Japan considering outlawing knives: ""Are you sure this thing is safe?"
On ex-Turkish PM on trial for fraud and corruption: "I believe it's some sort of Jawa dialect, sir."
On Simon's Asian blog roundup: "I am programmed in over 6 million languages, sir."
On the New Blog showcase:"We have found the computer outlet sir."
On the Llama Butchers:"The above photo-shop is designed primarily for Steve's screensaver? I'm not telling him that."
Update: On the Earthquake in Iran: "It's against my programming to impersonate a deity."
Update II: On efforts to remove life support from Terry Schiavo:"See above."
On Ward Churchill getting tenure by mistake:"I'm sorry, sir, my irony circuits seem to be on overload."
Update III: On the Editor's engagement to be married:"I say, good show."
On Hawaii outlawing the consumption of dog and cat meat:"Oh no the Rancor!"
Update IV: On Bush efforts to reforge old alliances: "Do take good care of yourself."
On President's day:"R2d2 You know better than to talk to a strange computer."
On Democratic Underground Hunter S. Thompson conspiracy theories:"Good heavens, no!"
UPDATE 2/23: On Michael Schiavo's attempts to kill his wife Terry: Click to here
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